Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Would you do it?

If you had a magic wand and could instantly make your kid "normal" would you? I have an absolutely wonderful 5 year old child who has Tourettes. It's not that advanced, some facial twitches, sounds, twirls, etc. She doesn't yell out curse words or anything . . . yet. But it's the idea that "something" is wrong with her. She's not like the rest. She's different.
I worry about her. What will it be like for her in the coming years. Will she be ostracized at school? Will she be picked on? Will I have to beat up some punk kid? It's alright now. Kindergartners accept anyone. They love without concern of what others will think. They treat everyone as equals. Well I say this but I know they view her as odd, but not bad odd just odd. They baby her and coddle her and even imitate her (not out of any meanness or spite but just because twirling looks fun and they want to do it too).
And I wonder if the idea for "normal" is selfish. Am I wanting normal just to make my life easier. Am I THAT lazy? Or is normal the wish of all parents. If it would make her life happier I'd do it. I'd make that wish, I'd wave the wand. But her nickname is Happiness, because she IS happy. She twirls around and stamps her feet and she has a smile on her face. Who ever said that normal meant happy?


  1. If you have to beat up some punk kid, count me in. You have a wonderful daughter who is smart, and funny, and sweet, and obviously awesome because she loves to twirl. There is nothing abnormal about any of that, and if other kids can't see that, then pfft to them. Your girl is special because she's a great girl, not because she has Tourettes.

    And screw normal. Who the hell wants to be normal anyway? <3

  2. Welcome to the world of blogs!

    It is normal for a parent to worry and suffer when they believe that there is something "wrong" with their child.

    But the fact that your little girl has Tourettes, which is a condition not a choice, does not make her "wrong." Yes, she's different, but who isn't.

    I remember high school. All the kids who didn't belong to the popular crowd went through those boring, difficulties that we now look back on and laugh.

    By the way, the popular kids in my school now have dead end jobs. Hehehe.

    You say she is happy? Great! That's all she needs. A happy childhood where she's made to feel joyful and where she can twirl, and stamp, and smile. If she grows up feeling good about herself, then everything else gets sorted out.

    I do know that excitement or worry or tiredness can make tics worse. That becomes the thing to control for her now. She'll learn how to take care of herself later.

    And, of course, learning as much as you can about the condition helps to alleviate fears.

  3. Addie recently told me "Mommy I don't want to do my tics anymore." I didn't know what to say but that Mommy didn't know how to stop them. I did get a much need pep talk from her psychologist yesterday. She told me I was handling everything perfectly and that she was impressed with our family. That made me feels so much better.